I don't mean to brag, but it only took me a week to wash, dry, fold & put away this load of laundry.
— Silleee Mcgheee (@lexiedawn) May 13, 2015
Every family should have a home escape plan in case there's a fire or your land line rings.
— Just Bill (@WilliamAder) April 15, 2016
I pulled out a little baggie filled with Tums and they'd gotten crushed in my purse and my Uber yelled, "YOU CAN'T DO THAT IN HERE!"
— Mel Gabor (@melgabored) May 8, 2016
Whenever I get sad about my Friday night I remember that some life coach is out there writing a blog.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) May 14, 2016
*decides to stop tweeting poetry inspired by passionate longing & unrequited love & only tweet poetry about my thirsty houseplants*
— Convos with Myself (@charmfoz) May 14, 2016