Drawing on Words

My 22yo just added a cup of rice to 6 quarts of boiling water. You know, just like you cook pasta.

I can never die.

— 🎭ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ🎭 (@3sunzzz) April 6, 2017

Why are greeting cards and novels the same price?

Maybe we should start giving people novels instead of these stupid cards.

— α geek (@alfageeek) July 16, 2016

My kid was so excited going to the bank to withdraw $15 from his account. Less so when they tried to sell him on a home refinance.

— John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil (@TheAlexNevil) April 5, 2017