Marie Antoinette: Let them eat cake!
Me, a French Revolutionary peasant: *lowers sword* Cake? Hey guys, let's hear what the lady has to say.
— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) May 30, 2017
Husband: UGH that kid is JUST LIKE YOU.
M: Light of your life?
H: [leaves room]
Me: [shouts] SUPER COOL?
— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) October 24, 2015
Me: while you're up there let's do a Spider-Man kiss
My dental hygienist: still no
— Allison (@sug_knight) February 27, 2017
[I quickly sit up]
Why must we continue this charade? You know as well as I do, I can't give you answers!
Dentist: OK, OK, no small talk.
— Angie B (@Angibangie) June 2, 2017
Relationship status: putting on my third date dress to go by myself to see a movie starring my favorite actor.
— Julia Gulia (@JRobb773) June 2, 2017