Me: *pours bowl of Cheerios*
3-year-old: I don't like Cheerios.
Me: These aren't Cheerios. They're mini donuts.
3: *eats the whole bowl*
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) October 4, 2017
They should let everyone on hold with customer service talk to one another.
— John Mayer (@JohnMayer) October 4, 2017
Chicken nuggets aren't found in chicken mines.
Thought you should know.
— God is Tricksy (@AdrianYoung10) October 6, 2017
I wish horses knew that every person who drives by them says, "Oh look. Horses."
— The Glad Stork (@TheGladStork) March 10, 2017
5: I feel sick and my medicine is pumpkin spice.
5: I don't know. I heard a teacher say it and it seemed to work.
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) October 6, 2017