This first one is a real insight into my sports knowledge:
[coworkers talking about college football] Me: rhode island school of design seems strong this year [silence] Me: yay sports
— Grant Tanaka (@GrantTanaka) September 22, 2015
At some point, a guy looked at an onion that was clearly purple & called it red. AND WE'RE JUST SITTING HERE LETTING IT HAPPEN.
— Tony (@Tmoney68) February 6, 2015
I'm so good at explaining the meaning of symbols I'm pretty much a legend.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) September 26, 2015
My daughter put a horse's head in my bed this morning. It was from an animal cracker but conveyed the message pretty clearly who is boss.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) December 4, 2014
I just showed up on time for something like one of those grown adult thingies. I mean, it was the wrong day. But still.
— Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) December 17, 2014