"I've…been here before." She ran her fingers along the wallpaper. "It's like I know this place."
"Kim! Mum's been drinking again!" #FP— Sarah Brentyn (@SarahBrentyn) October 23, 2015
Cop: You look pretty beat up, how many attackers did you say there was?
[flashback to me showing the cat my nunchuk skills]
Me: Easily 10— Dave (@T_N_Crumpets) August 4, 2015
You will not be happy with the answers, guy reading the nutritional information on a box of Toaster Strudels.
— Marc MacKenzie (@marcmack) October 9, 2014
I do my best math when I'm figuring out how much sleep I'll get if I fall asleep RIGHT NOW
— Bad Mikey (@BadMikeyBad) January 18, 2014
https://twitter.com/Jake_Vig/status/658303849829113856